Nobody Cares About You

I’ve written on this before, but here’s a little reminder, what you as a man think, feel, and desire don’t matter. Society doesn’t give a shit about you and expects you to take its shit happily.

A recent letter to an advice columnist (h/t: RPR) is from a slut who got alpha widowed hard. After getting alpha widowed she swore off sex outside of marriage. She meets a nice beta, who she lies to about her past through omission. On their wedding night, I’ll repeat: their wedding night, she calls out the name of the alpha who widowed her. Understandably, and thankfully for himself, Rick acted like a man and dropped her hard, setting up a divorce lawyer, calling her parents, abandoning her at the hotel to go to Europe alone, and cutting off contact (if you’re Rick and happen to stumble across this, good for you BTW, allow me to be the one voice of encouragement). So, the the lying slut wrote a woe-is-me letter about how to salvage her relationship as her lies caught up to her.

The story itself is not overly important. The ending was as happy an ending as could have occurred given the situation the lying slut created. The man can annul before the marriage is consummated and he probably won’t be divorced raped given that the marriage didn’t even last the night.

The practical take away there is to make sure you understand your wife-to-be’s sexual history. Do not assume she’s a virgin because she tells you she’s waiting until marriage, get her to explicitly say she is one. If she’s not a virgin, get her number, and weigh the odds. She may lie, but at least then she’s the one deceiving you rather than you deceiving yourself.

The other practical take away is to make sure that one of her previous relations was not “intense” or anything else similar. That’s in indicator of an alpha widow. You do not want to marry a woman who’s relationship with another guy was more intense than your own.

Beyond that fairly obvious advice, the part that matters is the response from Carolyn Hax, syndicated advice columnist published in 200+ papers. So know that she’s not some lone voice, she’s the mainstream of how modern relationship’s are supposed to work. Here’s what she wrote:

Your honeymoon and marriage are in tatters because Tom reacted with absolutely stunning hostility to a quirk of the human brain.

Lying to your husband(-to-be) and calling out another man’s name on the wedding night are “a quirk” and reacting poorly to it is stunning. But she gets worse from here.

But. For this to obliterate all of his supposed love and trust, plus any inner mandate to be kind? His commitment to you — as a human being, vs. as a bride or presumed virgin — can’t have been deep.

What love and trust? She lied to him for their whole relationship and used him. Where was her kindness as she was deceiving him and abusing his trust? Where was her kindness as she called another man’s name on their wedding night(!)?

She could hardly have shivved his soul and humiliated him worse had she spent months planning it. But when you think about it, she did spend months planning it, she just hoped he’d never find out.

Here’s the kicker:

He didn’t just get sad or angry, or yell, or cancel the honeymoon — he went for your emotional jugular and hasn’t let go. He called your parents to shame you. Making mistakes, that’s life. Living in fear of his reaction to your next mistake, that’s Hell.

This glimpse of his true character is a gift. Accept it and annul the marriage.

Out of all this the man is evil. The man is deceived, used, and betrayed on his wedding night by the woman who (deceitfully) professed to love him and reacts by annulling the non-consummated marriage and Hax calls him the evil one.

She doesn’t call out out the slut on her absolutely despicable behaviour other than to mention it was a mistake, not evil, just a mistake, which she immediately apologized for, but she’s fast to condemn the man as evil for reacting naturally and logically to this betrayal.

The commenters agree, but go even farther (at least until the red piller’s brigaded the comments). Here’s a collection of how much normal people hate men and sympathize with lying whores:

you got rid of someone who was going to do this to you somewhere down the line anyway. So much better to know he was a mean, abuser now than two years form now when you are more committed with maybe a mortgage and maybe kids.

What an arrogant *** this (hopefully soon to be ex husband) is. I guess he has never made a mistake in his life.

Run! Run as fast as you can AWAY from this probable abuser!

Yeah Tom’s a whiny little baby that doesn’t deserve a single look back from the LW. The immaturity of his reaction is only reinforced by his calling mommy and daddy to set up a divorce attorney for him. Set up your own stupid attorney! What a tool.

Your life, and the lives of any children you may have had with this person, would have been sheer Hell. Down the road, he would have found many other things about which to throw tantrums. You are very lucky to bid rid of him. If he changes his mind and wants to renew things, run as fast as you can.

yer better off without such an immature reactionary… imagine what kind of hell you’re going to have to put up with if something big happens… move on with your life… without mr. immature…

Get the marriage annulled, report hubby to the police for stealing your passport, next time be honest with your beau about how you don’t want a premarital sexual relationship now but have had one in the past, and learn to use the term “darling” when you’re in the throws of passion.

The commenters called him a (potential) abuser, an arrogant ass, immature,  and even said she should call the cops on him for “stealing” (ie. taking his own luggage, which happened to have) her passport. Barely any of the (pre-RP brigade) comments had even the tiniest amount of sympathy for the man or the slightest hint of criticism for the duplicitous slut.

This may be outrage porn, but I’m going to continue ramming modernity and progressivism down your throat until you vomit it out, because this is important for you as a man to understand.

In our society you don’t matter, your preferences don’t matter, your emotions don’t matter, your well-being doesn’t matter. Healthy marriage and healthy family doesn’t matter. Everybody believes you should be forced to eat shit so that the present dildocracy can roll on and if you object or protest to the shit-eating, you will be painted as the devil incarnate.

Don’t eat their shit. Don’t believe that are obligated to eat their shit. Don’t believe that it is moral to eat their shit.

If you can, find a good girl to marry and raise a prosperous, productive family with. If you can’t find a good girl, don’t marry a slut, or it might be you being pilloried for objecting to your wife calling out someone else’s name on your wedding night.


  1. Paul Elam once defined hypergamy as the female tendency to dehumanize men and effectively use them as appliances – dildos, ATMs, human shields etc. Sounds pretty accurate actually.

  2. Talk about taking them to the woodshed. I think the comments (and let’s be honest, these kind of agony aunt columns are hotbeds of this crap) reflect that according to the Feminist dogma, men can do no right. Even when the slut clearly did something immoral, lying to her husband and humiliating him, he carries all the blame for what happened next.

    Oh, he’s not allowed to call the parents?! By Traditional marriage standards, the woman has been a gift given by her parents (namely the father) to her husband. The gift was defective in the extreme, and he has every duty to inform the parents that their daughter is an unmarriagable slut. Who else will discipline her other than the parents?

    I would be proud to bear the scorn of someone who actually called me a Reactionary (glad it is still a dirty word to Progs). This man did the right thing. The disingenuous hag who had not a shred of decency to tell the truth right up until the marriage needs to keep her legs closed and mouth shut.

  3. Hax, who is also syndicated in The Washington Post, is generally reliable as a reflection of the Zeitgeist, wherever that is from moment to moment. Her relationship advice is almost uniformly terrible as a result, because it doesn’t take into account deeper motives and realities other than whatever the chattering class’s contemporary mores would have one believe.

    This chap is getting out easy on this. If the worst that comes of it for him is an irrelevant tongue lashing from Hax, life is looking up for him indeed.

  4. Disgusting but typical. An abuser is never as infuriated as when her victim first begins to fight back. The feministas are beside themselves now that men have finally begun standing up to them.

  5. There is wisdom here for those who have the ears to hear . . .

    Look at Hax’ response. After the groom’s shouting, insults, abandonment, and blowing the cost of the honeymoon, what’s the one thing that enrages Hax?

    The shaming call to the bride’s parents.

    Social status is lifeblood to many women, and its potential loss frightens them more than most men can imagine.

    This is a powerful tool to use when dealing with women. Use it wisely.

    Good blog. Keep up the good work.

  6. “Rick acted like a man and dropped her hard” Nope!

    In Carolyn Hax’s live chat soon after the letter was posted, the bride gives a follow up. The bride met with husband at a hotel, they cried together, and are back together. The new husband is a big sucker.

  7. If you can, find a good girl to marry and raise a prosperous, productive family with.

    If you’re a North American man, that means expatriating.

    The bride met with husband at a hotel, they cried together, and are back together. The new husband is a big sucker.

    If that’s true, then this guy is a castrato loser who absolutely deserves the divorce rape (and the scorn of real men everywhere) that he WILL suffer, probably very soon.

  8. He was probably extorted, that his real name and all personal secrets were about to be outed on twitter if he didn’t come back and sign his life away.

    Churchill once said something about war and dishonour. The happily newlywed cuckold is going to need to read up on that in order to prepare for what’s coming his way.

  9. I think “ramming modernity and progressivism down your throat until you vomit it out” is a good line. I feel like if you’re paying attention, life can do that to you without much help.

Leave a Reply