Tag Archives: Red Pill

Discussion on Game

I posted a review of Bang yesterday and this prompted me to think on if I will apply game in my own life.

I’m still on the fence about game. I’m a Christian, so casual sex is not something I plan to pursue, this seems to take away the most immediate reason to learn game.

Right now I plan on being a patriarch, not a player, so I am looking for a wife, and do not want to ruin that prospect with the player’s curse.

On the other hand, I do want to be an alpha male patriarch, not a whipped beta schlub. So, MMSL-style marriage game is something I want to pursue when I get married to keep my marriage happy and my wife attracted to me.

But for the mean-time prior to marriage I’m not sure.

Mentu’s advice on Christian game creates a really convincing argument for Christian men to learn game.

On the other hand, I do not want game to be necessary to attract my future wife though.

So, the conclusion I’ve come to for now it to slowly learn the basics of game over time, in particular confident movement and posture, outcome independence, and social/conversational skills. The kind of basic, underlying attitudes that will enhance my life apart from picking up girls, and will not require me to continually monitor myself and my techniques to keep my wife I gamed from leaving me.

I also plan to get myself into shape.

Apart from that, I won’t meet a girl to be my wife if I don’t get over my approach anxiety, so I plan to practice approaching women, not really gaming them, but simply to get over the anxiety.

Next month I’m going out of the country for a few weeks with family. I plan to practice some approaches to get over the anxiety then, when I have opportunities, as there will be less, but still some, social risk to (awkwardly) approaching women from another country who I’ll never see again. We’ll see how that goes.

The goal is to have the base attitudes of game by 30. Then depending on what I choose for my life, I can add on to the base as necessary.

The Bookshelf: 30 Bangs

I got my copies of Roosh’s books last week, and I read through 30 Bangs first, simply because it’s episodic nature and short length lent itself to being read through downtime during my rather busy weekend.

The book is simply a description of 30 different times Roosh had sex and the events and his actions leading up to the act. It is written in a very matter-of-fact, almost clinical, manner.

If you are looking to start learning game, this is not really the book. Game is present and you will probably learn something about it, particularly the game attitude, but this is no manual and the actual game techniques are sometimes glossed over in his stories. There is a small lesson at the end for the basic commonalities his success stories had.  If you are already learning game, his experiences might help you identify errors or find areas of improvement.

What I really like about this book is that it is a short, well-written, and interesting look into the life and experiences of a PUA, someone who has fully embraced the red pill. For those of us who (like me) have not tried game to any significant extent and to whom this kind of life is unfamiliar, it is a pair of binoculars allowing us to see through the windows into a player’s bedroom.

After reading this book though, I can say that I’m not very interested in the clubbing lifestyle. The descriptions of his nights out trolling for sex mostly seems joyless and mechanical. The book was obviously written analytically to deconstruct his experiences so they could be learned from, but I still expected some sense of enjoyment to leak through, but there was little. He could just as easily been writing about his experiences filling out TPS reports, for all the fun this book conveyed.

A couple times he mentions how a particular conversation or girl was fun or interesting, but usually it seems like he’s simply tolerating them and the bars for the hope of sex. For example, at one point he writes, “I was becoming skilled at tolerating stupid girls long enough to beat their pussies up in bed. Since she had a nice body with a tomato ass, I decided a little pain now would be worth a lot of pleasure later.” He writes similar things a number of other times.

While I’m sure having sex with lots of beautiful women is extremely pleasurable, the entire process seems unappealing. Reading Roissy and other game blogs, I got the impression that obtaining sex with game was a simple matter; a quick, fun conversation at the club with some gaming, then a trip to the women’s bedroom. Reading Roosh’s stories it seems to be a lot of trolling of clubs (and I personally dislike clubs/bars, as I don’t care for either crowds or noisiness, with the exception of metal concerts), engaging in conversations you don’t really care for with people you don’t care about (something else, I have a very low tolerance for), spending more time maintaining frame than enjoying yourself, then slowly weaseling your way into sex through manipulation and persistence.  I was struck by the amount of time/effort he seems to expend working his way from club to cab to apartment to bed to sex while slowly overcoming the resistance his partners put up; from my readings of game blogs, it had always seemed so much more breezy and quick.

Maybe I’m missing something, but it would seem to be a lot less effort just to pay for sex than to engage in all this for a few one night stands (I think I might have just had an idea for a future blog post) and the occasional short-term sexual relationship.

On the other hand, his day bang stories seemed less draining and effort consuming than his club game stories.

So, in sum, if you’re interested in knowing more about the life of a player, or for learning a bit more about game from real-life examples, I’d give this book a read. If you’re wanting to start learning game, try a different book first.

I found this book helpful, this helped me to know that I do not want the clubbing lifestyle. If I do ever end up fully swallowing the red pill, I will not be doing club or night game. It does not seem worth the effort to me. The temporary pleasures of sex, however fantastic, just do not seem to be worth the seeming grinding, joyless monotony of it. I’d either work on day game, pay for sex, or go without; any of those three would seem preferable.

One last note that’s probably totally unnecessary, but if you’re squeamish about sex or are a rabid feminist or whatnot, the book will offend you, but you could probably tell that from the title.

I still plan to read and give my impressions of Bang and Day Bang, but my reading list is filling fast, so I don’t know when I’ll get around to it. From this book, I’ve got a strong feeling I’ll probably appreciate Day Bang a lot more. I’ve also got Athol Kay’s The Married Man Sex Life Primer and How To Answer books on the way; I might read and review those first. We’ll see.

Starting Off – Primal Living

So, when contemplating the red pill, where to start?

I started by reading manosphere blogs; one I came across was Freedom 25. Frost’s position in life before he started his blog and quit his job seemed similar to mine (except, he was more successful with women and not a Christian), so I bought his book and read it while on a business trip. (I’d recommend giving it a read: if you’ve been around the manosphere for a while, there won’t be anything particularly revelatory, but it’s a nice distillation of basic red pill information that would be otherwise diffused among hundreds of blog posts on dozens of blogs).

Out of all stuff there, the one the least disruptive and most obviously beneficial change was diet. My diet sucked and I knew it. I ate fast food half a dozen times a week, I would drink a liter or two of soda a day (on top of liters of chocolate milk and sugary juice a week), and I would snack constantly on chips and candy. This was actually an improvement over a couple of years prior where it was fast food almost a dozen times a week and two liters of soda a day.

Frost (and other parts of the manosphere) recommended the primal/paleo diet. I researched it on the internet and it seemed legitimate enough to experiment with. So I bought the Primal Blueprint by Mark Sisson. I decided to have a fairly strict test-run primal living for 3 weeks and was fairly strict for those three weeks. I finished a week ago.

The Changes:

I cut sugars (except for some honey for use in sauces and a daily piece of dark chocolate), grains, starches, and milk/milk products from my diet.

I had eggs for breakfast, a big-ass salad for lunch (with a homemade oil and vinegar dressing), and meat for supper. For snacks: nuts (primarily almonds), berries, and rationed dark chocolate.

Bananas for energy when engaging in extensive physical activity.

Water, and water alone, to drink.

While many paleo/primal practitioners recommend local, organic, and/or grass-fed options, I ate fresh and frozen meat from the grocery store and non-organic fruits and vegetables, as the extra expense and hassle of organic and local food did not seem worth the benefits..

Go to bed earlier for 8 hours of sleep (averaged 6-7 hours a night previously).

Wake up 30 minutes earlier so I could read the Bible and do daily exercise. Two things that I had been missing in my life.

Daily exercise: started with 25 four point presses, 25 sit-ups with bridges, and 20 lunges.

The Results:

I was more lethargic than usual for the first week, despite getting adequate sleep the entire week (I generally did not get enough sleep prior to going primal),  but not exceedingly so. The second and third weeks I had somewhat more energy than usual, but not more than a proper sleep itself would likely explain. I did find that I had more endurance for physical activity by the third week.

My mood tended not to fluctuate as much as it did prior to the diet. It’s possible the end of insulin spikes helped with this.

I cheated a few times; all when out with friends or coworkers. I went for coffee with a friend and ordered a sugarless hot chocolate (I don’t like either coffee or tea), ate a handful of chips on a couple of occasions, had a rye and coke on one occasion, and I had a Clubhouse Sandwich for a work lunch. A few cheats, but limited. I found being out with friends was by far the most challenging part of the primal diet. It’s not hard to avoid things at home, but when everybody else is snacking around you, it’s hard to resist.

For some reason, I really craved a chocolate milkshake for the last two weeks, I also had the occasional hankering for chips. On the other hand, I surprisingly did not really miss soda, candy, bread, cereal, etc. I had thought for sure I would crave soda, but I didn’t. I actually started to almost enjoy water, something I rarely drank before I started outside of when I played sports or was at martial arts class.

Making salads did take up more time than the sandwiches. I saved time by just making a giant salad on Sundays and taking some to work each day, although, at the cost of it not being as fresh as it might have been by the end of the week.

Cooking meat took more time than fast, boiling KD, or nuking a hot dog. On the other hand, it tasted better than the nuked hot dog and cost less than fast food.

I have never had weight problems, so I didn’t do this to lose weight. Until a few years ago I was very skinny with a BMI under 20, but was in terrible shape, with no real upper body strength, no endurance, and no discernable muscle mass. Then I took up martial arts; over the about two years I gained about 50 lbs, most of it muscle mass, some of it a gut. In the first week I lost 10 lbs, then lost 5 more lbs over the next two weeks: 15 lbs in total. My gut noticeably shrank; enough that others even commented on it.

Made my way up to 35 four point presses, 35 sit-ups with bridge,  and 30 lunges. Added squats, started with 10, increased to 20.

The takeaway:

Eggs are an awesome food. They will be my breakfast. A big-ass salad make a great lunch. I prefer both to the sandwiches I used to have for both breakfast and lunch. This will make up the core of my eating

I am cutting soda out of my regular diet, but will indulge occasionally when out with friends. Same with sweets (outside of some dark chocolate).

Meat will be my primary supper. I may have the occasional pot of KD (maybe once a month) or a hot dog with a wrap.

Water will continue to be my primary source of hydration, but I plan on buying a 2-litre of natural juice and a 2-litre of chocolate milk a week. I don’t think I’d be able to go without chocolate milk ( I used to drink about 4 litres of it a week).

When out with friends and family, I will relax and fully enjoy myself. The cost of not being able to snack and eat out with friends, family, coworkers is greater than the expected gain of avoiding a limited amount of chips, sodas, or pizza.

I am going to buy one bag of chips a week for the week (down from 3 or 4 a week). I craved them too much: if I don’t have a limited amount of them, I will inevitably binge.

I will allow myself to occasionally indulge in a milkshake or ice cream.

I am going to avoid fast food, but might indulge occasionally when I am lacking time.

If I really want to eat something not primal, I will indulge myself, but primal eating will form the core of my diet.

I will try to go to bed earlier so I can sleep more: I’m aiming for 7-8 hours a night.

I will continue waking up 30 minutes earlier and continue exercises.

I do not plan on going to organic or local options at any point in the foreseeable future.

If I ever do need weight loss, I will go strict primal for a few weeks. It seemed to work well at this.

Recommendations: I would recommend going primal to others, especially for weight loss purposes. I don’t know if the weight loss was from eating primally or just from cutting out soda and candy, but either way, I lost 15 lbs and noticeably trimmed my gut, while increasing the amount of exercise I was doing (and presumably my muscle mass). I gained some endurance, which was nice. I had fewer changes to my mood, possibly due to a lack of insulin spikes. It’s more expensive than eating grains and starches, but cheaper than fast food.

So that was the first step.

The next step: I ordered Roosh’s Bang, Day Bang, and 30 Bangs; they should be here in the next week or so. I’m going to read them through; I’ll probably post reviews when done. I might post some thoughts on them while reading. I probably won’t apply most of the information as, at this point I am not interested in pursuing meaningless sex as it would be against my religious beliefs and I’m still hoping to find a nice Christian girl to settle down with, but game is one of the foundations of red pill living so I should investigate it.

Contemplating the Red Pill

Welcome to the home of Free Northerner.

I’m a Canadian, a conservative Christian, and an alt-right libertarian.

Growing up I had always accepted societies norms (or at least evangelical norms): go to church, believe in Jesus, behave in school, trust authority, go to university, get a good job, obey the law, respect authority, pay your taxes, get married, have kids. I accepted these values; I still mostly do.

In the past years, I’ve been questioning what I was taught by society, and slowly I’ve become increasingly disillusioned.

Over the past years, I’ve read about libertarianism, conservatism, and economics on blogs and in books (not in university, of course: outside of specifically economics courses it was mostly progressivism that they “taught” me): I realized that the socialist dogma and white guilt I had learned in school was wrong. My first dip into the alt-right blogsphere came when I found Steve Sailer and the Steveosphere. I learned that a lot of what I had been taught concerning science, society, tolerance, and equality was wrong. From the Steveosphere, I eventually wondered into Roissy. I read about game and the sexual marketplace but only for intellectual interest. I never really fully bought it and had minimal interest in applying any of it.

But that may change. I’m considering the red pill.

In school and through the first half of university, I was an omega male. A loser with few (sometimes no) friends who was incapable of talking to women, incapable of carrying on a conversation with anyone outside my family and friends, and who spent most of his time reading or playing video games. I was depressed, lonely, and hated my life.

So, I decided to change it. I learned how to engage in conversation, I learned how to talk to women, I became more social, I joined university groups and expanded my circle of friends. I began to like my life. I had friends, I would actually have social activities on the weekends, I could talk to girls, and I even managed to have a couple short relationships. Through hard work, practice, and tons of fear, I managed to work my way up to the status of beta male.

My life was on the upswing. I graduated, after a year of underemployment, I found a good government job. I bought a house. Life was good.

But now, I’m becoming dissatisfied with my life again.

I want to get married and raise a family, but I haven’t had a relationship in a couple years. I very rarely meet quality girls worth pursuing and when I do, I get rejected.

I own a house in preparation for my hoped for family. It’s much more space than I need or use, and eats up a significant portion of my pay and I find the mortgage somewhat constricting.

By any typical definition my job is excellent: good pay, good benefits, good pension, low stress, easy work, etc. but oftentimes the work I do seems pointless, and sometimes I don’t even have enough work to do, so I sometimes feel like an economic parasite. I’ve been questioning if it’s worth the mundanity, repetitiousness,  and pointlessness of my work is worth the benefits. But, the golden handcuffs keep me. My degree is fairly worthless outside the government, so I don’t know where else I would get a job and I need a job to support the family I hope to have and pay the mortgage.

I find myself lacking motivation, questioning my life choices, and questioning my faith/religion.

Recently, I have discovered the manosphere outside of Roissy. I have read of the red pill and the hazards of marriage (and divorce). I read Freedom 25, In Mala Fide, and Captain Capitalism and realized that others have felt similar to what I have now, but dropped out of the accepted way of doing life.

So, I’m considering a second major change to my lifestyle. I’ve set myself a time limit of when I turn thirty, a couple years away, to figure out what I want to do with my life.

I don’t know what’s going to happen. I might meet a nice conservative Christian girl and settle down. I might decide to take the red pill. I might decide to learn game, I might decide it’s not worth it. I might sell my house. My Christian faith might grow, or it might whither and die. I don’t know, but I have to think about it and choose, because I don’t want to live life as dissatisfied as I am now.

So, this blog. I’ll be writing my thoughts on the issues and hopefully there will be discussions which help me clarify my thinking on my life.

So come with me as I contemplate the red pill.

You might see the downward spiral as a nerdy Christian turns into a nihilistic asshole, or you might see a questioning man’s faith in God, society, and family renewed and strengthened.