Monthly Archives: August 2013

Omega’s Guide – Sports

You should now have started to learn social skills and have attended martial arts instruction. The next step is to further meet people and get into better shape through a sport.

A lot of the reasons why you need a sport are similar to why you need a martial art: you’ll get in shape, the competition and learning new skills will give confidence, you’ll be able to meet new people, and, hey, being active in sports (especially winning) is attractive to many women.

To being with you probably want to join a recreational league; no offense, but you’re probably not cut out for competitive leagues. If you are, all the best to you, compete away. Also, rec leagues are usually less financially demanding.

Now, summer is over, and fall is coming up, so you’ll probably have to join a fall, winter, or all-year league at this time or find a casual, but regular, drop-in sport night. That’s fine, choose a sport that interests you and will be available in fall. Even if it’s not your first choice, play a season, then in spring register for a sport that’s more to your liking.

I’ll run down a few sports you can look at at the end of this.

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Where to Find a Sport

Your city should probably have a leisure guide. If you have no idea what kind of sport you’d like, find the leisure guide online and see what’s available that peaks your interest.

Some churches, especially the larger ones, have intramural sports, drop-ins, or a team in a church league. These are usually comparatively inexpensive as the churches often fund parts of it as a ministry or own their own facilities. If you go to a church check to see if they have something you can join; if you don’t go to church but live near a mega-church check out they have anything, they’d probably be thrilled to have you join.

Many community centres will offer some kind of sports. Check your local centre to see if they offer anything of interest.

If any of your friends, co-workers, relatives, etc. play a sport, ask if you can join them and their team.

If you are going to school (college or high school), your school will probably have intramurals of some sort. These are usually cheap and easy to join.

Larger companies will sometimes have a team in a local league of some sport or another. Check with your company/union’s social committee or the work bulletin board to see if you can find something.

If all else fails or you have a particular sport that interests you, simply google for a rec league or open-door sports night near you. You’ll find one and most allow individual registrations. There’s also more general rec leagues that will offer a variety of sports.

There are lots of ways you can find a place to play sports.

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Choosing a Sport/League

Unlike martial arts, there’s not a big list of things to watch out for. It’s pretty hard to make a scam out of rec sports; you simply show up and have fun. Make sure the cost is in your budget. Make sure the league takes safety into account and has rules of good sportsmanship. Make sure the team you’re on is good folk. Other than that, there’s not much to it, but here a few considerations for your sport:

Keep in mind cost. Some sports, such as ultimate or soccer, require little much more than park space and a ball/disc, others, such as hockey, require more equipment and/or a special facility rental.

Is it co-ed? Some leagues are, some aren’t. Which you want to join will be up to you. Co-ed leagues are generally less ruthlessly competitive and will often have more rules concerning safety/sportsmanship. On the other hand, you’ll get a chance to meet some women in a co-ed league and it will likely be more casual/less intense. Which is better depends entirely on your preferences.

Is it an individual sport or a team sport? Simple enough, a team sport will give you more chance to interact and develop bonds with a small group within an us vs. them context, while  an individual sport will be lead to more loose interactions dependent more on your actions. I’d suggest a team sport, especially if you intend to try to make friends, but its up to you.

Do you have the time? Some sports demand more time than others. Since you’ll be playing rec league, it probably won’t require more than one game a week and possibly an occasional practice, but make sure you can commit to that game on that night. You don’t won’t to be the asshole whose always letting the team down.

You can choose a league or a drop-in/pick-up sport. A league will require more commitment from you; drop-in nights are more casual. Drop-in nights or pick-up games are usually not as easy to find as they are often associated with particular organizations or a group of friends rather than a rec league which is generally open to all.

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Recommended Sports

Below are some popular rec league games you can try to join:

Ultimate – Ultimate Disc has become an increasingly popular sport in recent years. It’s cheap and it’s a good workout. There’s no contact and big on sportsmanship. It’s usually co-ed and mandates gender numbers per team, so it has a comparitively high number of females playing. It can be played most of the year, outdoors in summer and fall leagues and indoors in winter. Indoor leaguse are more physically demanding and faster due to the smaller field space. It’s a good choice for a sport.

Soccer – Along with ultimate one of the two I’d recommend. It’s generally cheap, a good workout, and fun. It’s also low contact with both outdoor leagues in the summer and indoor all-year round.

Hockey – I’m Canadian, so I have to mention this. It’s played in winter, but street hockey leagues can be played in the summer. It can be one of the more intense and high contact sport and due to the need for ice and safety equipment it can be more expensive, but is it ever fun. Broomball and sponge hockey are usually a less intense and less expensive alternative.

Basketball – The classic sport; not overly expensive. Generally male and often more competitive. Teams can often be smaller than in most other team sports. A good one to try.

Football – Contact football will be expensive and there’s not many rec leagues for it due to the chances of injury. You’ll probably be able to find a touch or flag football league if you like football. It’s usually outdoors and doesn’t run in winter. It’s usually male only and can be more competitive and intense than the other sports here.

Baseball – The American classic. A summer sport of moderate expense due to the specialized field and personal equipment. The large team size and slow game pace makes it well-oriented to getting to know other people, but doesn’t provide as much physical activity. It will often be slo-pitch in rec leagues. Baseball rec leagues are rarer and will usually be mostly male; softball/slo-pitch are more common and will be higher proportion of women.

Bowling – The classic working-man’s game. It doesn’t require much of a work-out but its relaxed pace and atmosphere gives you plenty of time and opportunity to shoot the shit. It goes all year-round and is easier to join as it less tied to seasons than other sports, but it can be a bit more expensive due to lane costs. Ten-pin has heavier balls and more pins; I prefer it, but a lot prefer the smaller balls of 5-pin. If you want to join, contact a bowling centre.

Dodgeball – SWPL-types have adopted this children’s game for adults. If you enjoyed it as a kid and don’t mind SWPL-types it can be fun. It can go all year round.

Racquet Sports – Rec leagues will usually use badminton, but tennis and the rest are similar. It’s an individual sport (or teams of two), so most of the people you meet will be competitors, meaning you’ll have to try a bit harder to get to know people.

Volleyball – Not much to say on this. Do you like volleyball? Also, it generally has a higher proportion of women than other sports.

There’s a bunch of other sports, but those are some of my suggestions to look for. You’ve probably played most of them in gym class as a kid so you already know which ones you enjoy.

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Your Goal:

This week, your goal is to find a local rec league and join the fall season. Alternatively, you can find a weekly drop-in/pick-up night and join that.

The Archetypal Modern Woman

I think we now have the physical incarnation of the manosphere archetype of The Modern Woman. From this point on, when someone wonders what the manosphere means by the modern woman, we have a specific person we can point to.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you: Tracy Clark-Flory.

You may have heard of her before, but the dude did not take my advice to RUN NOW, so the story just got better. But before I get to that, I’m going to outline exactly how she makes the perfect archetype of the modern woman.

We can start with the double-name, which came pre-marriage, suggesting she comes from a feminist line. She has your typical worthless degree (BA in English from a Californian liberal arts college) and a job at the liberal rag Salon writing about sex and relationships.  We can see from her profile picture above that she was fairly good-looking, a solid 7 (Edit: This rating was controversial, read here for more).

That’s a good start, but it gets ever so much more entertaining.

During her pretty years, she spent her youth on hooking-up and casual relationships. In her owns words, at 24 she “had roughly three times as many hookups as relationships,” but she’s not a slut as she “never had a one-night stand, only several-nights stands.” She passionately defended the hook-up culture arguing it never hurt her going through guys like she was “making an enthusiastic check mark next to every box” on “the Career Center’s job placement questionnaire.

She did indeed have fun times in her youth, but they did not last. A couple of years later, she still defends the hook-up culture and encourages one night stands, but she softens saying, “maybe we’re beginning to also allow ourselves more nuanced feelings about our hookups.  Like Klausner and Anderson, we can now acknowledge regret over a one-night stand, without being considered, or seeing ourselves as, forever ruined women…”

Just a year later, she begins to express second thoughts about casual sex, stating that most people find friends with benefits relationships to be “overwhelmingly negative.” “At some point [she] realized that, despite [her] insistence otherwise, [she] actually wanted those sorts of intimacies, only with an actual commitment.”

Her descent into absolute sluttery isn’t quite done yet though. Two years later, in 2012, she sees her favourite male porn star in a bar, and decide she has to fuck him. So she does. The sex is the narssicistic, hollow, rote sex one would expect from such an encounter:

It’s exactly what I had breathlessly watched him do many times before, but this time it seemed mechanical and theatrical. Instead of being entertained, I was doing the entertaining, and I suspect he was too — but for whom, exactly? We were the only audience.”

“Despite the emptiness of it, [she] felt a sense of accomplishment over my conquest.” Yet, a little while later she begins to question herself and “began to feel shameful”, “What kind of man will want to be with a woman who’s slept with a male porn star?”

But don’t worry, her hollow, meaningless sex had meaning and made her a better person. She now has “a whole new appreciation for the difference between fantasy and reality, and how much sexier the latter can be when you aren’t striving for pornographic perfection.”

By pure coincidence, “not too long thereafter I got into a relationship with just such a guy.” This had absolutely nothing with the the profound sadness and hollowness she felt from her “conquest”.

At this point she’s careening towards the wall face-first:

The combination of aging and her empty experience with the porn star send her into a frenzy of self-introspection. She realized she “spent her twenties having lots of good sex, but faked her way through nearly every climax.” She “now climax[es] reliably, sometimes even effortlessly, with Steve [which] seems nothing short of a miracle.” She finds out she likes having relationships, even ones which grow out of hook-ups.

Realizing that she likes relationships, she then does exactly what every modern women does when faced with age and emptiness, starts demanding “real courtship.” Just half a year after she shags a male pornstar on the first night and writes about her awesome relationship with Steve, she finds a new beau. But this one is different, this beta boy doesn’t start with hook-ups, like Steve, no, he brings her aging self flowers. She is “shocked to find that traditional courtship is pretty great.” Yay for her.

But unlike the porn star or Steve, beta boy does not get sex that same night. Nope, beta boy is special and “there’s a specialness in waiting until you’re comfortable enough with someone to get naked together while totally sober.” Beta boy has to work for what she gave the rest of the world so freely. He had to go on five dates, pay for big meals, pick her up in a cab, etc. before he got what McPornstar and Steve got for being available in a bar.

With her newfound love of traditional courtship (ie. making beta boy earn her sex and love), she then starts trying to convince everyone that men love relationships, but dislike casual sex, because that would be convenient would it not?

Recently, we found at she has a happy ending to her tale. She’s getting married to beta boy and is talking about becoming a mommy. In a shocking twist, it turns out beta boy was actually  someone she first met “around the same time that I wrote that first hookup essay.”

Looks like beta boy’s been pining away for five years and finally made good (after she spent the last of her youth on dozens of other men).

She could have had his love the whole time, but “even if [she] could, [she] wouldn’t in a million years go back and shake [her] 23-year-old self and tell her that she’d already met her future fiancé.” She just loves her memories of empty fucks with pornstars and her relationship with Steve far too much to give them up for boring old love with beta boy.

But this is good for beta boy because she “would have loved him the same.” Why her “hookup years made [her] more accepting of [her] fiancé’s imperfections.” Can’t you just feel the love she has for him.

Having had her alpha fux and having secured her beta bux, she is still encouraging other women to follow in her path. Her story is a “reminder that the hookup hand-wringers are wrong, and not to be trusted.” It’s a story of true love winning out; young women can fuck whoever they want and still end up with a pliable beta to pay for their children.

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So, in a nutshell, Tracy Clark-Flory is the the stereotypical, nay, archetypical, modern woman. She fucks uncountable alphas, ignoring the beta who likes her, throughout her years of youth and prettiness. She realizes how empty it all is, but only once the wall approaches and the good times are coming to an end, so she uses the last of her fading feminine charms to husband-up the barely tolerable beta.

All that’s needed now is her complaints about how beta boy won’t divide the chores properly, followed by a story of how she’s falling out of love with him, followed by her divorce within the decade. Then there will be stories about how being a single mother is hard, how dating as a single mother is hard, and how there are no good men left.

If we’re lucky (and beta boy isn’t) there might even be a hilarious story of how she pined for Steve throughout the years of her marriage to beta boy.

So, whenever someone demands an example of alpha fux/beta bux, or wonders what we mean by the modern woman, we only need to point them to this post.

Here’s to you Tracy Clark-Flory, you are the Archetype of the Modern Woman!

You won the mating game. You got the alpha fux and have almost attained the beta bux. To you we raise up a rousing course of “da professional womenz ode.”

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I’ll say it one last time, just in case he comes across this:

To the guy marrying Tracy: RUN AWAY. Run as hard and as fast as you can before you are legally bound to her. Do it; this will not end well for you. I hope, for your sake, you find this and take heed my warning. If you don’t lulz will be had at your expense in the future.

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A lot of the information was cribbed from Susan and Vox.

Lightning Round – 2013/08/14

Roosh disassociates himself from the manosphere.
Related: Martel responds.
Related: Reaction and the manosphere.
Related: A response from Dr. Faust.
Related: Krauser and Tom talk on the issue.
Related: It doesn’t matter.
Related: ABlack spade (cards) saw this was going to happen.

Truth unites the manosphere, but there is more to life than biomechanics.

Chad embraces the traditional lifestyle. Welcome brother.

You know enough right now.

Belated strengthening: raise your boys for conflict.
Related: How to screw your boys up for life.

How to stop living your life in transit.
Related: Don’t fake who you are.

Advice to my 15-year-old self.
Related: How to avoid financial regrets from college.
Related: Cyrus the Great on wealth management.

The crapshoot career: do what you suck at.

Newcomer Anarcho-Papist has created a taxonomy of the reactosphere.

A woman’s love can’t be reasoned.

The many levels of game.
Related: On shit tests from 1910.
Related: A new niche: blind game.

How women tool men.

Explaining trade-offs to women.

Manosphere analogies need improvement.

Remember, leftists greatest hate is reserved for leftists who aren’t pure enough. Also, look at the double-standards she holds towards the middle of her piece. Hilarious.
Related: Feminist excited by misogyny.
Related: This is amusing: sex positive feminists decrying the fruits of the sexual revolution.

This is what a male feminist’s mind looks like.
Wow… Watch the breakdown on Twitter (archived here) or in .pdf format.

Roissy with a good set of links.

Requiem for the patriarchy.

Rethinking Christian marriage: a plan.

Just another example of churchuanity.

Marriage advice: #2 misses the point and I’d be wary of #4.
Related: 8 signs a girl’s a keeper.

Managing money in a marriage.

Love and control.

The status of being married.
Related: Desperate for attention.
Related: Advice for young women looking for marriage.
Related: Some graphs and stats on never-married women.

Having children is important for women.

Child-free narcissism.
Related: The dark side of child-free.
Related: Higher female intelligence and longer lifespan lead to less babies.

Woman cannot achieve the same social status as men.

M3 with a smattering of sources on rape.
Related: Girls commit more dating violence than boys

Winner of the beta of the year award.

The collapse has already come. Collapse and disaster are different.

The history of leftism against freedom.

The Captain advocates heightening the contradictions.
Related: Enjoying the decline on food stamps.

Why am I a believer?

Kicking away the crutch of religion from the broken is “the cruel and thoughtless act of a self-centered asshole.”
Related: Don’t do heroin.

Anti-racism is a white thing. Related.
Related: Anti-racism is anti-white racism.
Related: Burn the witch.
Related: Jason Richwine needs to read some Moldbug.

Time preference and civilization.

The biological vote.

We should focus less on avoiding invading other’s property and more on protecting our own.

Wizard privilege.

High intelligence whites more likely to be hypocritical about race.
Related: The latest in stupid liberal offence-taking.

Evidence white women are the most beautiful.
Related: The white slave trade. More. More.

Traditional religion and eugenics.
Related: Soft eugenics. A bit more.

Hope for Norway?

The police state grows.

The US government can yank your passport very easily.

Lavabit goes down, as does American freedom.
Related: Silent Mail goes down as well.

The US to import thousands of refugees from jihad-filled country.

Carl Rove is an idiot.

It is official Democratic strategy to politicize tragedy.

American forests being destroyed and shipped to UK for renewable energy.

Skeptic of Darwinism.

Is the McDouble the greatest food in human history?

The dangerous side of birth control.

Slate feminist on child care. Like most on this issue, she can’t math.

The falsehood of comparative statistics.

The skills men lack.

Marketers know that women will intrude into men’s domains, but men avoid women’s.

The mirth the idiot left brings me.  We made a teenage pregnancy problem, now we are reducing it to less insane levels.

The insanity of hypocritical prudery surrounding breastfeeding.

The best period of American growth was before the Fed and income tax.

Krugman is an ass: when Keynesian becomes socialist.

Detroit’s debt and your debt.

Krugman is an ass: Japan shows inflation doesn’t work.
Related: Japan’s debt reaches one quadrillion yen; that’s 1,000,000,000,000,000 Yen.

The more tyrannical the vaccinators become, the more sympathetic I am to the anti-vaxxer cause.

Is libertarianism becoming popular enough to be hijacked.

Nudging: the new authoritarianism.

Jezebel verges on crimethink. Related. (Googlecache)

Proper mass orientation.

The handrail of the law.

Missing the point: we all have an “F” grade, but Jesus save anyway.

Pro-life doctors banned from presenting at conference.

Dr. Gay Hitler lived in Ohio. Hehe.

15 tips for language self-study.

40 maps that explain the world. I like maps.

Test your geek IQ: I got 209.

The economics of indie game publishing.

(H/T: BoingBoing, the Captain, SDA, Instapundit, Vox, Borepatch)

Omega’s Guide – Martial Arts

You have now joined Toastmasters and bought How to Win Friends and Influence People. You  have started to practice what you have read in the latter and are on your way to learning basic social interaction skills.

Now it is time to gain confidence. You will gain confidence in your social skills as you practice, but to really gain confidence you have to have something to be confident about. So this week’s task will be to start training in a martial art.

Why should you train? A few reasons:

  1. Nothing gives you confidence like training in martial arts. Throughout my 13 years of public schooling, I was by far the most confident during the half year I was in Taekwondo.  The accomplishment of attaining a real skill, the manly vigor from hard work and training, the adrenaline of violence, and the knowledge of being able to fend for yourself should violent interaction occur combine to give you confidence like nothing else can possibly match (other than maybe enlisting). A few months of training and you will feel more confident throughout the rest of your life.
  2. You’ll meet people with a similar hobby. Those social skills you’re learning won’t mean anything if you’re not meeting people.
  3. You’re attaining a practical skill that will make you a better person. Martial arts requires and trains you in strength, discipline, and perserverance.
  4. You’ll get in shape. A martial art will require physical activity and will provide a base level of physical fitness.
  5. It will also make you more attractive to the opposite sex. Nothing attracts the femmes quite like being able to display physical dominance through an implied ability to wreak physical violence.

Those together should be more than enough of a reason to join.

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Before I go any further, I should say I am  not an expert. I have practiced a martial art for about 3-4 years and done some reading on the issue. What I am writing here is mostly my own opinion and knowledge; people with more experience and knowledge than me may disagree with some of what is written. A lot of the advice concerning martial arts, particularly when it comes to choosing a school/style, can be very controversial. My advice is meant to help guide you at the beginning, but it is not the be all and end all. Use your own common sense.

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Purpose

First, you need to know what your purpose for training is. The type of school and instruction you choose should be determined by what you want to get out of it.

If you simply want a place to get a manly workout, grow some discipline, and hang out with other people interested in the same, most martial arts will do.

But if you have a specific purpose or goal, you will have to choose the right art to accomplish your goal. If you want to sport fight, you will need to choose certain arts that focus on this aspect, such as judo. If you want to try MMA sport-fighting others will be necessary, such as MMA and Brazilian jiu-jitsu. If you want to kick ass “in the streets” (this should always be said with sarcasm/irony) you will need others, such as krav maga. If you want to learn weapons, bujinkan, fencing, or kendo will be the way to go. If you want to steep yourself in long-held martial tradition and culture, most oriental arts will be good. If you want to learn throws you’ll need a different art than if you prefer striking and you’ll need another if you wish to focus on ground-combat.

Each art has a different focus and a different style and will suit different purposes, you should choose an art that is focused on what you want. Also, choose an instructor in that art that will provide the kind of instruction you want.

If an art does not meet your purpose, choose a new one. (This is not a license to jump from art to art or instructor to instructor for no reason. If you’ve tried 3 or 4 instuctors/arts and none are “right”, you should seriously consider whether the problem might be you).

One particular aspect to remember is its effect on your life. An art that focuses on hard training, heavy competition, or full contact can lead to faster, more efficient learning and can be fun, but it can also lead to long-term injury or strain that can have negative impacts on the rest of your life. On the other hand, a holistic art can lead to positive improvements to other aspects of your life. It’s up to you and your preference what you choose, but be make sure to take this into account.

I’ll do a rundown of some of the major arts you might be interested in at the end of this post.

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Your Attitude

Before you begin, adjust your attitude. It is the single most important thing on whether you get anything from your training. Training is a commitment, you will only get from it what you give.

  • Are you prepared to attend regularly? If you are not willing/able to attend at least once a week you should just skip it.
  • Be prepared for the long haul. Learning an art takes years of difficult practice. Make sure you are committed. It will often be frustrating and you will often be tempted quit and give up. Don’t.
  • Be prepared to learn. This is simple enough, be open to instruction and have an open mind. You are there to learn, do so.
  • Check your ego at the door. Any good instructor will be correcting you; any good student you work with will offer tips for improvement. When they do, be gracious and improve. Don’t get defensive. Don’t make excuses. Don’t be offended or angry. Nod and accept instruction with gracioussness.
  • Don’t be an ass. The other students are there to learn as well. Treat them with respect; don’t pound on the new guy or act like you’re better than the guy who’s been training for a decade. Help facilitate the other students in learning.
  • Embrace the pain. Instruction will hurt. You’ll be thrown, you’ll be hit, you’ll be tired, you’ll be sore, and your joints will be bent in all kind of uncomfortable positions. Expect the pain, accept the pain, embrace the pain.
  • Relax and enjoy. Don’t be afraid, don’t be tense, don’t be mordbidly serious. This should be fun. Enjoy yourself, enjoy the company of others, and enjoy your training. Don’t go too far with this. Take your training seriously, don’t be an irritating jokester who ruins the training. Fit in with the mood of the dojo; if the dojo’s mood is either too serious or not serious enough for you to train, find one that fits better.

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Research

Before anything else, go online and find out what kind of martial art instruction is available in your proximity. Knowing you want to learn Jeet Kune Do won’t do you a lick of good if there’s nobody within 500 miles to teach you.

Choose which ones sound interesting then research. Rea search the art being taught itself, the dojo, the instructor,etc. Find out as much as you can about the ones that interest you. Joining an art can be a large investment of time, money, and effort, so know a bit before your begin.

Here’s some things to look out for in your initial research and first visit.

  • Does the instructor/dojo/art have a lot of negative reviews on the internet? There will always be detractors and cranks, but use your sense, are the criticisms valid? If they are valid are the aspects being criticized acceptable to you?
  • Is the dojo/instructor licensed? Some of the more established martial arts, such as Taekwondo, will have central governing bodies. If a dojo is not a member of its central body, there’s probably a reason; be wary. Membership implies a certain basic standard for instruction, but it alone is not a guarantee of quality. Note, many arts do not have a licensing body, so don’t worry about it if there isn’t one, but this also means that there is no guarantee of a base standard of training.
  • Check out the instructor’s credentials. Is he an advanced black-belt in his system (or a few systems) or if in a non-belt system, has he been training for a while with quality instructors? Does he claim an absurdly high amount of credentials? (A 30-year-old claiming to be a black-belt in 12 arts is probably not reliable).
  • Does the dojo/instructor bash other arts? A lot of people get involved in stupid dick-measuring contest over whose art or school is better. If the dojo’s site has a lot of this, it’s probably not worth the time.
  • Is the art the new invention of the instructor who mixed the best of everything? It’s probably a scam. In most cases you want to go with an art that is established.
  • Does the instructor/dojo claim secret, arcane knowledge or super techniques? Most good martial art techniques are fairly simple, mechanically speaking (simple does not mean easy). If the site goes on about their secret techniques or arcane knowledge, it’s likely BS. No, there is no such thing as an unblockable, invincible move. Every technique has a counter and every technique has a weakness.
  • Does the dojo promote a holistic approach to training? Training can encompass more than just learning how to hit somebody. Often it can also focus on other things such as proper diet, proper exercise, balance in life, proper breathing and relaxation techniques, overall body control and usage, etc. Whether you prefer simply learning to just beat people’s faces in or a more holistic approach, see if the dojo support your preference.
  • Related to this is technique versus principles. All arts and instructors will teach both techniques and principles, but on a sliding scale some arts/instructors will focus more on training techniques in response to specific situations while others will focus more on on the use of your body and the training principles behind the techniques. Leaning towards the former will help with learning self-defence faster, but the latter will help with learning it moer thoroughly. The latter is also more prone to abuse, as the results are less immediately tangible. Neither is necessarily better, but you should wathc for this to meet whatever your goals may be.
  • Be careful of dojos that seem to hooked on “cool” things such as ninjutsu, samurai, ancient warriors, special forces, etc., as often poor instructors will try to make up for it with flash. Some arts, such as bujinkan, do have a heritage of ninjutsu or samurai and some, such as krav maga, have a history of military training, so this is not absolute. Also, a little bit of advertising flair is okay. But if the primary focus of the dojo’s site is on “be a ninja in two years”, or “train like the SEALs do”, or something else “cool” like that, be wary.
  • Does the site focus on the training or the belt? The belt is a sign of the training; it is not overly important. If the instructor’s site guarantees you a black belt in two years, or focuses too much on the attainment of the belt rather than the training itself, then he has the wrong attitude. If the belt is that important to you, buy one of Ebay for a couple bucks.
  • Does the site make unrealistic guarantees? If you’re guaranteed to be a black-belt master in a year, skip it. Everybody learns at a different pace, someone guaranteeing something by a certain time period is likely just pushing you through a belt mill.
  • Does the site/instructor make unrealistic claims? No martial art will make you invincible. No art will train you how to “beat” an opponent a foot taller and 100lbs heavier in a fight. No martial art will teach you to beat a gun-wielding maniac while unarmed. There is no such thing as an unbeatable technique.
  • Contracts and introductory classes. A decent dojo will usually give you the option of watching a couple classes before joining. A good dojo will usually have an introductory deal of a few classes or a month of classes for newbies. A dojo requiring an expensive, long-term contract before letting you try or watch a few classes first is likely not a dojo you want to be a part.

If your research leads you to think the dojo might be an acceptable place to learn, move on to arranging a visit.

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Your First (Few) Visit(s)

Once you’ve decided on a dojo you want to try, set up an appointment to attend and begin your introductory classes. While there here’s a few things to watch for:

  • The instructor is by far the most important external aspect of any martial arts training. Finding a quality instructor is far more important than which art you will choose; any art will be useful if taught well, and any art will be worthless is taught poorly. Make sure you get a good instructor. Ensure he’s competent, honest, disciplined, knowledgeable about his art, and all-around a fundamentally good guy. If he strikes you as dishonest or sleazy, don’t return. If he slags on other schools a lot, don’t return. If he doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing, don’t return. If nothing else, make sure you have a good instructor, that will make up for almost any other faults, while a bad instructor will ruin any other good aspects of the training. An instructor that’s an ex-cop, ex-prison guard, or ex-army, etc. will likely have been in situations of real violence and will likely be a better teacher than someone who has not seen real violence.
  • Is the instructor respectful of his students? A good instructor will correct his students, sometimes harshly, but he will also be respectful when doing so. An instructor who disrespects or bullies his students is not one you want to follow. (Remember above, correction, even harsh, violent, and painful correction, is not bullying or disrespect).
  • Is the class carried out in safe manner? Bruises, welts, and a certain level of pain are a necessary part of training and accidents causing major damage will inevitably happen, but recklessness is not something you should tolerate. If the instructor engages in or allows reckless or dangerous actions leave and do not come back. Of particular note is the dojo’s methods of joint manipulation; holds, bars, and joint manipulations should be done and should hurt but should always be controlled. If viciously reefing on people’s joints is accepted in the dojo, you are going to seriously suffer for it in the long run.
  • Is the training lawful? This is simple, the instructor should not be teaching you to violate the law; if he is, leave. A good instructor will point out the legal implications of the actions he is teaching. He will teach you about the proper use of force. An instructor who doesn’t is not one you should be learning under. ex. If the instructor encourages you to stomp on the face of a downed opponent without mentioning the legal consequences of such an action in real life, you probably don’t want him teaching you. If an instructor encourages picking fights, don’t train with him.
  • Consider class sizes and personal time. Is the class a good size? Optimally it will be about a dozen or less; a larger class is not necessarily a deal breaker, but only if ran well. Did the instructor, or at the least one of the instructor’s high-ranked students give you some personal instruction? Don’t demand or expect the instructor to focus only on you, but he (or in a larger class, one of his subordinates) should occasionally give you some personal feedback.
  • Are the students respectful of each other? A good instructor will maintain discipline and a proper attitude among his students. If his students, especially the more advanced ones, are bullying or disrespectful the instructor and dojo are probably not worth your time.
  • Observe the high ranked students closely. These are the kind of people the instructor and his training will turn you into. Are they skilled? Are they competent? Are they in shape and disciplined? Are they respectful? If the advanced students do not display the qualities you want to eventually display as a martial artist, the dojo is probably not for you.
  • Observe the demographics of the students. The bulk of the general students (assuming you aren’t attending family classes, a ‘new students only’ class, or other demographically specialized classes) should be relatively fit men in their 20-40s. If the students, especially the more advanced ones, are mostly out-of-shape, the dojo has low standards (if some of the white belts/newbies are out of shape, that’s not that big a deal). If there are a lot of children under 16 with black belts, be wary, the training might not have particularly high standards. If there are a lot of middle-aged women, the training likely has low standards. To simplify, if the type of people in the classes loko like the type of peopel who wouldn’t hold up under solid training, you are not going to get solid training.
  • Did you enjoy it? Training is tough and often painful, but you should get some level of enjoyment/satisfaction out of it.
  • Is the training realistic? If you are training for self-defence the training should be realistic. A practical martial art should focus on disarmament, de-escalation, and withdrawal.
  • Is there contact? Any good martial arts training designed for fighting will include solid contact.  Many dojos/arts will train at half-speed for learning purposes, that’s fine, as long as the contact is still solid. Solid does not necessarily mean hard though. It’s rather difficult to explain, it’s more something you experience. but I’ll attempt. Think of it like throwing an object. If you underhand a hacky sack at someone, they’ll feel nothing, that’s soft and not solid. If you whip the hacky-sack at someone it will sting, but it won’t not them back or disrupt them; that’s hard but not solid. If you whip a fist-sized rock at someone, you’ll break their rib and knock them to the ground unconscious, that’s both hard and solid. If you lob the same rock at them underhanded, you’ll knock them back and they’ll know they’ve been hit, but without serious harm; that is solid, but not hard. The best training is the lobbed rock; when you’re hit and hitting you want the contact to be felt, to rock you back, to seriously disrupt you, but you don’t want it to be get to the point of serious injury.
  • Does the instructor teach aliveness? To teach basic techniques, the compliance of your training partner is a necessity. No technique is “unstoppable”, in fact most are, mechanically speaking, rather simple to counter if expected. In any training of basic techniques your partner is allowing you to practice on him and vice versa. For example, simply going rigid can stop many a joint lock (short of simply blowing through a joint), but will leave you open to a strike, but because you are practicing a joint lock, your partner probably won’t strike you, so your vulnerability won’t be readily apparent, but your “successful” counter will be. A good teacher should be teaching you how to actively comply with your partner so you both can learn. On the other hand, he should not be teaching you to simply go limp or to fall over for your partner; he should not encourage your to fall when your opponent taps you or to give the lock when your opponent screws it up. Aliveness is allowing your partner to use you, but still providing a level of resistance suitable to his training level/needs. A good instructor should be training his students to actively comply and actively resist.
  • Is there sparring? Any good martial arts training designed will include sparring at some point. Some will arts/dojos will reserve sparring for more advanced students because the system/instructor believes those students without the requisite training will not learn from sparring, while others will through you in right away; either way is fine, but if no one, not even the high-level students, ever spars, the training is unlikely to provide you with any useful fighting skills. Also, sparring should include solid contact. If simple touch is enough to point in sparring, the training will not be teaching you much self-defence-wise.
  • Are you sore/tired? Good training should be work and it should hurt. Not every class will focus on intense, physically tiring activity, some will focus on more technical aspects that don’t require as much physical effort, but if you’ve been going for a month and have never broken a sweat or received a bruise, the training is probably not worthwhile. Again, if you aren’t being hit hard enough to bruise at least occasionally, you are probably not receiving good training.
  • Does the dojo overuse patterns? Patterns, repetition, drills, kata, and or whatever you wish to call it will be involved in any training as you everybody needs to drill the basics, but if everybody spends the entire class running patterns against an imaginary sparring partner the training is going to be of limited use for fighting.
  • Is there a lot of spiritual mumbo-jumbo? A certain amount of talk on qi does not necessarily invalidate the usefulness of a traditional art, but if the art relies on focusing your qi to do techniques over distances or over-emphasizes qi, it might be quackery.
  • Cross-training. MMA has highlighted the problems with focusing solely on striking or, to a lesser extent, grappling. A good school for self-defence may focus on one or the other, but it should cross-train both. If the dojo you attend focuses only on striking, you may want to either reconsider the school or plan to attend a school focusing on the grappling after a few years.
  • Are the facilities maintained? A certain level of messiness is fine, some dojos train outside, and many dojos can’t afford fancy facilities but if the facilities are dangerously run down be wary.
  • Be wary of board-breaking. If any emphasis is put on learning board-breaking, you probably don’t want to return. Board-breaking is a relatively simple skill to learn that has no real benefit beyond looking cool. It’s mostly a waste of time.
  • Everything I said about belts, contracts, secret knowledge, etc. also applies to your introductory visits.

A lot of this is vague and subjective, none of it is hard and fast, so use your common sense and make sure your chosen place to train fits your goals. When choosing your art/dojo you may have to make some compromises based on the availability in your area, that’s fine, nothing is perfect, but never compromise on safety, the quality of the instructor, or the lawfulness of your art.

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The Style Wars and Real Fighting

Before I do, I should note a major controversy between traditional and MMA-influenced styles. When the UFC tournaments first started, most of the traditional striking-based schools got blown out of the water in the competition, sometimes embarrassingly so, while Royce Gracie dominated with Brazilian jui-jitsu. Since then, a vocal faction of the MMA-oriented schools have derided the traditional schools as useless (Bullshido is a favoured portmanteau). They will strongly attack the traditional arts and advise against them; they will also demand that any art must show it’s potential “in the ring” before it has any validity.

While there is a lot of BS found in many of the traditional schools and in McDojos, most traditional arts have adapted to the changes by adding grappling curriculum to rid themselves of the deficiencies highlighted by the MMA tournaments (and many of the grappling arts adopted some striking techniques). You can get good training in the traditional arts, whatever some of the style-wars extremists may argue, you just have to be careful for the things I mentioned above so you don’t end up in a scam.

Some of the traditional arts will exclude competition because their training regularly includes dangerous or unsporting techniques (eye gouges, groin attacks, etc.). That’s not a problem, insofar as the art is teaching proper technique properly. Being able to win at sport-fighting in a controlled environment is not the be-all-end-all of martial arts, it’s biggest problem being its heavy focus on ground-based grappling, something you never want to engage in in the real world, but if you never spar or train in active resistance you won’t learn anything of use in a “real” situation.

In terms of “real” fighting most martial arts will give you a leg up on untrained and inexperienced opponents of similar size and weight. No art will allow you to simply make up a huge size difference (there’s a reason MMA has different weight categories) and anybody that claims otherwise is likely untrustworthy. As well, the kinds of people who fight and brawl a lot in real life, generally labelled violent felons, will likely have more “real” experience than anybody in any kind of fighting art. No art will prepare you to “win” against these kinds of fighters.

The major hurdle in a real fight is psychological. A real fight is fast and often unexpected; its not like in the movies, or even the MMA, where people kick and punch each other over many long minutes. Fights usually start and end fairly rapidly because the aggressor wants to seriously hurt the other person and will either succeed shortly or be stopped rapidly. On that point, sheer naked aggression can often overcome any amount of training; the will and desire to inflict damage on another by itself is often usually enough to “win” a fight. Most people are unaccustomed to desiring to seriously hurt people; in any martial arts training, even the most heavy contact MMA, people are generally restraining themselves and trying not to hurt the other. Adrenaline (and drugs) can let the body withstand an amazing amount of punishment; it’s unlikely you will be able to take down someone hopped up on rage or PCP, no matter you training. The combination of surprise, fear, and aggression of a real fight will usually make most of your actual techniques and training. The biggest advantage of training should be simply learning to stay calm instead of panicking in the face of aggression.

In terms of real life fighting, your training will provide you with a leg up, that is all. It is not a guarantee of being able to win or even hold your own. Any art worth taking that is designed towards self-defence should be training you to not panic, to disrupt your opponent (preferably using trained muscle memory), then remove yourself, rather than trying to “win”. You are simply not going to be able to reliably “defeat” much larger opponents, adrenaline-fueled aggressors, or experienced, violent criminals, not to mention the potential legal ramifications of “beating” someone in real life.

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The Arts

Here’s a small summary of a number of the more popular/more talked about arts. I’ve tried to be neutral regarding the style wars and have tried to give each each art a fair shake in both its strengths and weaknesses. Partisans of a particular art can feel free to flame me in the comments.

MMA – If you want to do MMA fighting, a specialty MMA dojo/gym is probably the best way to go. MMA places will focus mainly on sport and will often be some combination of Brazilian jiu-jitsu, kick-boxing, judo, Muay Thai, and wrestling. You will learn both striking and grappling. MMA sport-fighting will apply to real fighting quite well. You may end up concentrating a lot of effort on less “practical” ground-work (you never want to on the ground for extended periods in a “real” fight) and you will likely be trained out of certain unsporting techniques, such as attacks on the groin and eyes.

Brazilian Jui-Jitsu – This is primarily a grappling art focused on grappling your opponent to the ground to go for submission. It became very popular following its success in the MMA and is a staple of MMA fighting. A must if you plan on doing MMA-style sport-fighting. For practical self-defence, you should do some cross-training if you take this, as you do not want to be going to the ground in public for extended periods of time.

Boxing/Kick-boxing – The classic American martial sport. If you want to get into boxing sport-fighting, this is obviously a must. It’s primarily used for sport and is striking based, so cross-training into grappling is a must if you want to transfer to MMA or for self-defence purposes. Also, be careful about using this for self-defence, as there are major differences between fighting with and without gloves and boxing itself is heavy on rules.

Greco-Roman Wrestling – Another sport-fighting art which is focused mainly on bringing your opponent to the ground, it is essential for that sport. It can also, with cross-training, be a good base for MMA. The rules of wrestling are fairly strict, so it’s probably not the best for strictly self-defence purposes.

Muay Thai – A traditional Thai system focusing on striking with particular emphasis on the use of knees and elbows. It’s a full-contact art with a large emphasis on conditioning. The violence and hard training of it can lead to it being a problematic art to keep up in the long-term. It is a base of a lot of MMA striking techniques and it has its own competition system.

Krav Maga – A stripped down martial art developed for and used by the Israeli Defence Force. It completely removes any holistic aspects and is concerned with teaching someone as efficiently and rapidly as possible to enact violence for survival. It can be thought of as the assembly line martial art for those wanting to learn self-defence as quickly as possible. There is a fair amount of quackery and glorified exercise instructors teaching this art, but if you can find a good instructor it can be good for self-defence.

Karate/Taekwondo – The two big ones of the traditional striking arts; karate tends to focus more on punching, while Teakwondo focuses more on kicking. Both gained strong popularity a few decades ago, but suffered a loss of prestige in the martial arts world following the introduction of the UFC. Due to their popularity, the arts are rife with McDojos and frauds. You can get good training if you get the right instructor and in some areas these may be the only arts available, but be careful. Neither are heavily used in the MMA, but both have their own competition systems. Kyokushin Karate is a form of karate based around heavy contact and would be a solid art for self-defence purposes.

Jujutsu – A traditional Japanese art focused on grappling that has numerous schools and has morphed many times. There is are so many forms of it and it forms the base of so many other schools that I could not give an adequate summary of it. It can mean almost anything.

Judo – A traditional art derived from jujistu that is based primarily around grapples and throws. It is often used as a base art in MMA and it also has its own sporting system. It’s an excellent art to learn.

Sambo – A form of judo mixed with traditional Russian wrestling styles. It has its own sporting structure. While the sport has not had that large an impact on MMA, combat sambo is very much similar to the MMA.

Aikido – A traditional Japanese art focused on using an opponents force against them and on facing multiple attackers. It’s advantages are that it doesn’t require much strength as it is more about redirecting your opponent’s strength and its one of the few arts that concentrates on multiple opponents. It’s often criticized for its unrealistic training and it can have some heavy spiritual aspects to it that some people find off-putting. Shodokan Aikido adds a more competitive and realistic element to the art. It also has a weapons component to it that may be of interest to some.

Kung Fu – Kung Fu refers to a wide variety of Chinese martial arts with a wide variety of emphases and styles; far too many to summarize here. There is a lot of impractical showiness throughout many forms of Kung Fu, so if you are looking for fighting practicality be wary. Wuushu, in particular, is known for it’s showy performance aspects. Wing Chun is one of the most popular forms in the west and is more oriented towards real world fighting; it focuses primarily on close range striking and grappling. Kung Fu often often offers training in traditional weapons and some styles have their own sttructures of competition.

Bujinkan – A Japanese art made of a number of different traditional samurai and ninja schools. It has a very broad focus, familiarizing students a wide range. It also places a relatively strong emphasis on training with traditional weapons; if learning traditional weaponry is your goal this is the art to try.  It’s connection to ninjutsu combined with its lack of official guidelines leads to a high proportion of frauds and craziness. If you can find a good instructor, its broad focus and emphasis on disabling attackers can make it effective for self-defence.

Systema – A Russian martial art with some links to Russian special forces that focuses on body management and movement while eschewing techniques. It can refer to a few different strains of Russian martial arts and sometimes is also used to refer to combat sambo. It has a broad focus and a holistic approach grounded in the Orthodox faith. It’s special forces links and the holistic aspect of it can lead to a fair amount of fraud and quackery. You may be able to find a good teacher, but be careful. It’s history may interest Slavs and the Orthodox.

Fencing/Kendo – These are sword-fighting arts. You won’t get any self-defence value out of them, but if sword-fighting appeals to you, it can be a good way to instill some martial values and discipline and socialize with other people.

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Your Goal:

This week your goal is to find a martial art you that interests you, contact the instructor, and join the arts introductory classes.

Schroedinger’s Rapist

I came across this old post on two major studies of self-reported rape. When asked about having sex with someone against their will (rape by a less off-putting name) about 6% of men said they had (or had attempted to), about 4% of men had said they had repeatedly. In other words, about 4-6% of men are rapists. This is a little more than I thought it would be (my guess would have been about 2-4%). Of these rapes, 70% of them involved intoxication. (I would have thought this to be much lower, in the 30-40% range).

I think the first survey (Lisak and Millar) at this link is probably more accurate. The narrowness and exactness of the questions prevents the problem of subjective opinions on rape. The self-identification aspect of it prevents the problem of false accusations of subjective feelings on the point of the accuser getting in the way (‘I may have consented, but it felt like rape’). The non-judgmental tone (ie. the word rape is not used) would likely limit underestimation. All in all a good survey.

The second (McWhorter) survey I would think would be less accurate and overestimate incidences of rape. It is done of naval recruits and, not to knock the military, but men in the military are likely more highly aggressive with higher testosterone than the average man, and therefore more likely to engage in aggressive sex, of which rape would be one type. But other than a higher overall rape incidence (13% as compared to 6%) the breakdown of rape is similar.

Here’s some thoughts:

From this we can tell that most rapes are the products of a small minority (4%) of men. Only a third of rapists rape once, then never do so again. It would seem from this that anti-rape education might be effective against the 2%, but the majority of rapists and the majority of rapes are committed by a 4% who are committed to their raping. It seems unlikely that anti-rape education would be effective against the repeat offenders, as their actions do not seem to be ‘mistakes’ or a lack of understanding of consent, but rather purposeful actions.

The vast majority of men (94%) have not raped at all. Most men are good in this respect. Any anti-rape campaign that may seem to implicate all or most men as rapists or potential rapists would likely decrease their sympathy for those who are actually raped. As well, a high incidence of false rape accusations may do the same.

Given that a third of men have rape fantasies and only 4-6% rape, we then know that about 15% of men act on their fantasies, which means 85% of men who are inclined to rape do not do so. The large majority of men have base control over their primal urges and know that rape is wrong.

It would seem prudent for women to be somewhat cautious of men, particularity in certain contexts, but a generalized fear would be coutnerproductive.

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As noted earlier, 70% of rapes involve the victim being intoxicated. Any reasonable person who actually wants to stop rapes would advise women not to become intoxicated to the point they are incapable of resistence.

Given that the large majority of rapes could be prevented by women simply not getting shitfaced, it would seem prudent for women to simply avoid drunkenness.

****

About 8-10% of rape reports are false, (although, it might be higher). Compare that to the 4-6% (possibly up to 13%) of men who are rapists.

Any women who would apply the Schroedinger’s Rapist heuristic should also be in favour of applying caution to the immediate accepting of rape accusation given that any particular rape accusation is more likely to be false than any particular man is to be rapist.

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Given these thoughts, if I were to attempt a campaign to stop rape I would focus on two things: alcohol and repeat offenders.

The majority of rapists are serial rapists and the majority of rapes involve alcohol. What needs to happen is that serial rapists need to be reported and punished. If serial rapists are either removed from society or discouraged through punishment the large majority of rapes will be prevented.

Second, any campaign needs to emphasize to women to stop drinking to excess. Any other advice concerning self-defence, avoiding certain clothes, being confident, etc. all pales in comparison to simply not getting drunk. Any prudent women looking to avoid rape will avoid drunkenness.

I would also strongly condemn and discourage false rape reports. False reports add to the signal noise making it harder to find and deal with serial rapists who are committing most rapes. If people start believing that many rape reports are fake, they will be less inclined to accept accusations against a serial rapist.

Things I would avoid:

Advice to men such as “don’t rape” or discussions of the the finer points of consent. The advice of “don’t rape” is silly, as these serial rapists doing the majority of raping likely know what they are doing is wrong. Telling them what they already know is not going to help. As well, telling the 94% of men who don’t rape condescending advice of “don’t rape” (ie. assuming they are going to rape unless told not to) will likely make them less sympathetic and backfire.

Anything that looks like it is accusatory of the general male populace rather than rapists themselves. Again 94% of men don’t rape and won’t look kindly upon being lumped in with the 6% who do and the 4% who repeatedly do. You want the 94% to try to distinguish themselves as much as possible from the 4%. The worst thing for a campaign is if the 94% begin sympathizing or identifying with the 4% in any way.

Those are my thoughts on this issue for now.

Lightning Round – 2013/08/07

The Minter event has led to a discussion of bitterness in the ‘sphere:
Dr. Illusion: Stop whining and be responsible for yourself.
Matt Forney: Most people don’t want to be helped, be one that does.
Aurini: The unknown unknown of MGTOWs is that men need women.
Young Hunter is disgusted.
Francis: Selling shit to the manospambots.
Kid Strangelove: Enjoy the world, it’s not so bad.
YouSoWould: Idolize no one.

A major player leaves the manosphere. I didn’t read Rob regularly, but what I did read was usually good. Check out his obituary for some of his hits.
Related: A eulogy for Rob. Another.

Game distilled. Sadly, I’m a “sperg”, so this is difficult.

What if you don’t like STEM or the trades? Enter sales.

The essential question: Does this bring any additional value to my life?

The fall of Hugo Schwyzer. Hehe.
Crush their spirits. (See them driven before you…)
Grerp is back with a post on Schwyzer.
More on the Schwyzer “saga”.

Comparative advantage and pussy.
The used car lot analogy.

The GoTo guy
Guys opting out.

Good is not always nice. Also, I didn’t know Kratman (one of my favourite SF authors) commented on Vox.

Roosh laments the loss of his ability to feel romance.
“Getting laid isn’t the addition of pleasure to your life. It is the removal of a punishment.”

The most hateful hatefacts.
Related: What will be the next insane antitruth?
Related: Does habitual dishonesty make clear-thinking impossible?

Donal on attraction and desire. Similar themes to a post of mine.

The ego filter.

The List and rebellion.

The subtle destruction of Biblical headship.

Rethinking the Christian marriage script.
Related: The dangers of a long engagement.

Women, be a low maintenance wife.

Sexual harassment talk is the persecution of omegas by gammas.

Dostoevsky on feminism. I’m about to start reading the Brothers Karamazov, so I found this interesting.

101 ways to castrate yourself.

A feminist defines patriarchy as the separation of private and public sphere by sex and the appropriation of individual sexuality by the community. She’s consistent on the latter. It seems like it might be the basis of a good working model.

The manosphere (MRA part) reaches the Canadian mainstream.

Australia: More pay for equal work.

15% of rape reports are false.
Related: Sexual assault and the US military.

Roy Baumeister: a red pill ally in academia.

Science: Woman are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear.

Defending male space.

Egalitarian libertarianism has no future.

Why you need entitlement.

How to talk to children. Maybe taking questions literally is one of the problems of those lower in the socio-sexual hierarchy.

I’ve never understood lying on the internet either.

New reactionary site: Theden.

The benefits of monarchy.

Was Benedict the last Catholic pope? A good discussion in the comments.
Related: The problem of Pope Francis.

Gay couple suing to force church to “marry” them. Because it is all about freedom and fairness.

Traditional Catholic taxation.

The first rise and fall of the English left.

The continued decline of the journalism industry.
Related: I wonder why?

The government tracks everything.

The university as a civil seminary.

Is the college bubble popping?

Are you smarter than an 8th grader from 1912?

Slaves to obesity.

Does smoking have some positive effects?

Xenophobia is a natural survival instinct.
Related: On racism.

White boy on school bus is culturally enriched.
Related: Britain is being culturally enriched.

28 years in jail for judge who was bribed to send black kids to private jail.

Sometimes I wonder if liberals are literally brain-damaged? How utterly retarded do you have to be to not understand the distinction between having something imposed on you and not forcing others to subsidize your desires? It is almost impossible to overstate the absolute stupidity of the comments section.

A feminist really stretching to find her 2-minute hate. It’s kinda funny.

Hahaha… The delusion of the left is a wonder to behold.

Americans are more compassionate than socialist Europeans.

Unions picket child’s funeral.

Many of the buttons you are conditioned to press don’t do anything.

Woman brags about raising adrongynous boy and grumpy girl. Why do feminists seems to have a war on smiling?

FreedomWeb shut down by FBI.

The US government is re-writing economic history.

Chinese banks in trouble.

Just another example of the hypocrisy of the leftist elites.

Barack Obama, the left, and the growth of the state.

Congress exempted from Obamacare. The people exempted keeps adding up.

The US government subsidizes Al-Qaeda.

Compare:

(H/T: BoingBoing, SDA, Vox, Patriactionary, Nick, GLP, the Captain, Foseti)

Omega’s Guide – Social Skills

The first thing an omega needs to do is learn basic social skills, such as how to hold a decent conversation and speak in front of others.

Before I begin, I should mention, this is not going to be easy. (None of this guide will be) It took me years of hard work and overcoming fear to get to where I’m at, and even so, I’m still nowhere near charismatic alpha. It will be hard work, but it is definitely worth it. The nice thing though, is that even small improvements will have large effects at the beginning. There will be lots of little times along the way when you will say to yourself “I did that? 6 months ago I would have thought that impossible.” Also, it might go faster than you because I’m giving you a guide rather than having you figure it out on your own.

I’m not going to tell you what social skills to learn as part of this guide, because I’d be a horrible teacher. If you want to know what you need to learn for social interaction you can go online and find all kinds of advice on how to do this. How to Succeed Socially, for example, is an excellent resource for building social skills. I’d encourage reading through it.

The problem is, reading alone is not going to help you and searching the internet looking for continually more reading is simply going to distract you. You need to interact with people while you learn, but I know when I say that it sounds stupid; if you could interact with people you wouldn’t be reading this. What you need is a plan and something to push you to interact. But I can’t meet you in person and other people have already made concrete plans that are better than anything I could make.

So, I am going to tell you how to get started to learn social interaction skills.

You are going to join Toastmasters and buy How to Win Friends and Influence People. You are also going to join the Dale Carnegie course, if you can afford it.

I took the Dale Carnegie course (paid for by my grandfather) and it was, with no exaggeration or hyperbole, life-changing. I probably got more out of that one evening a week for three months course than the 6 years of courses I spent in university. If you are socially awkward, I can not recommend it enough. Every week you learn new social techniques and practice them in the class. You are then instructed to test them in real life; the course motivates you to test them because the speaker’s are very motivational and you don’t want to be the only one to not have a story of implementing what you learned the next week. It is an amazing course.

The problem is that it costs a lot. When I took it was about $1300; it now looks to be about $1700-2000. That’s quite a bit of money. If your work has some kind of training fund, see if you can get them to pay for you. If you can afford it on your own pay for it yourself. If there is any way you can come up with the funds join this course.

If you can’t, don’t worry too much, there’s a poor man’s version, but it will require more motivation from you. Most of the actual content in the course can be found in How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, which can be bought for under $10. The problem is that you don’t have the safe practice space and the external motivation the course provides, so its a lot harder because you have to make your own motivation.

It will be less structured, you won’t have the professionals motivating you, and you may miss the nuances training provides, but you can still get the just of it by reading and implementing the book.

So, if you can’t afford the course, buy the book and implement it. However, do not read the entire book in one sitting, you won’t get too much out of it. Each week read a section, then spend a week implementing whatever you learned throughout your normal activities, the next week read the next section and implement, and so on.

Also, join Toastmasters. Toastmasters is fairly inexpensive (<$100/year) and a great way to learn speaking skills, improvisation, and overcome your fear of others. It will provide an organized and non-judgmental environment in which to learn speaking skills.

You can find a club to join here. There should be one near you.  Contact them and, if they are meeting this week, go to the meeting. Not all clubs meet in the summer, so it might be a few weeks before your local club meets next, but make sure to contact them this week, then attend the next meeting. Don’t put it off.

Weekly Goal:

This week you will either sign up for the Dale Carnegie course or buy How to Make Friends and Influence People. You will also contact and sign up for Toastmasters and attend the first meeting if your local club meets this week.

Have this done by next week, so you can move onto the next part of the guide which will go up next Sunday.